A Simple Life, A Quiet Heart

Wow! It' been quite a while since I posted here. I apologize. Our life has been crazy since Jethro was born. Rebuilding has begun on our house, so I have been shopping...looking for light fixtures, doors, faucets, cabinets, windows, etc. If you would like to see how God has provided for us so far, please feel free to check out my family blog . That is also where I update on Jethro.

I have been longing for a simplified, less hurried life (wonder why???), and yet it would seem at this point in my life, God is saying, "No." We have to make the trip into Spokane at least once a week, sometimes more often, Jethro has been hospitalized at least a half a dozen times, had surgery to place a g-tube, been scheduled for heart surgery, had heart surgery postponed due to a cold, and now we are awaiting a firm date for the surgery again. In the midst of that, 2 of the boys were on a local mission trip, camp happened for two of the children (which did tend to bring a bit more quiet to our home!), 2 of the boys have moved out, we've had 3 birthdays, and driver's ed. And did I mention we're building a house?!?!

So, I believe that God is wanting me to learn how to have a quiet heart in the midst of all of this. And it is something I have been contemplating a lot lately. Last week, at the thrift store, I picked up an Elisabeth Elliot book entitled, "Keep A Quiet Heart". I just began it this morning, and wonder of wonders, it appears to be *just* what God has been speaking to my heart about! Not surprising. He usually works that way in my life...I'll probably start hearing stuff on the radio too, and someone else will bring it up in conversation, etc... :-)

I am hoping to share with you here some of the insights that I am gleaning. Obviously, I've done a terrible job keeping anything going here, but I will try to do better. I know we will have at least one hospitalization this month, so I should get some blogging done.

I would like to share a bit of the first chapter from this book, a bit that was just confirmation to me that I need to have a quiet heart in the midst of my circumstances. If you are in a season when you can't cut things out of your life, but long for a quiet spirit, a spirit of contentment ~ take heart! I believe it is possible, just a little more difficult when surrounded by chaos.

"Jesus slept on a pillow in the midst of a raging storm. How could He? The terrified disciples, sure that the next wave would send them straight to the bottom, shook Him awake with rebuke. How could He be so careless of their fate?

He could because He slept in the calm assurance that His Father was in control. His was a quiet heart. We see Him move serenely through all the events of His life - when He was reviled, He did not revile in return. When He knew that He would suffer many things and be killed in Jerusalem, He never deviated from His course. He had set His face like flint. He sat at supper with one who would deny Him and another who would betray Him, yet He was able to eat with them, willing even to wash their feet. Jesus in the unbroken intimacy of His Father's love, kept a quiet heart."  Elisabeth Elliot, Keep A Quiet Heart 1995

Do I have that kind of trust and reliance on God? In some areas, but not woven throughout my entire life. But it is what I long for.

Come, join me at the feet of Jesus as I seek to learn what it is to have a quiet heart.

Quick Update

Sorry that I have been so absent! I have things I want to blog about, but there is not a lot of time these days, and now we have dial-up :-(, so I try to be careful about the amount of time I spend on the computer ~ not a bad thing!

We have been out of the hospital for almost a month. Jethro is doing well, we have a small pharmacy in our house now, and I think I may be on my way to being a nurse, but we are adjusting. We go to Dr.s appts (scheduled) every other week, but have seen our Dr.s about once a week since getting out. We spent one afternoon back at the hospital, but the Dr. ended up releasing us, so we didn't spend the entire weekend, which is what we had expected. We are so thankful that the Lord has blessed us in this way. When they discharged us, they told us to expect to be back...it just works that way with heart babies.

On St. Patrick's Day, our house burned. This is not the phone call you want to get when you are in the hospital with a baby in the PICU following open heart surgery! However, God is so good! Because we were in the hospital, none of the children were home, and we did not have to worry about anyone being hurt. We lost some precious things, but in the end, they are just that...things. And it was so much easier to put into perspective the loss of a house when we were/are dealing with life and death issues with Jethro. Please don't misunderstand ~ losing the house and our possessions is still not an easy thing, but I believe that if it was the only thing we were dealing with it would be much more devastating. As always, God's timing is perfect, and I praise Him for the ability to see that.

So, for the time being, we are in a rental ~ a house I have wanted to live in since I was a little girl ~ and waiting to see what the insurance is going to do. We will rebuild, it's just a wait and see game at this point. If you are so inclined, we would appreciate prayers for the insurance company to work quickly and for wisdom for us in how best to proceed with a rebuild. There are so many options, but we may not have a lot to rebuild with, and we need a fairly sizable house with the number of us that there is.

So, that is the Cliff Note version of what's going on. Thank you to those of you who continue to come and read. At some point, I will get back to posting on a more regular basis.

Announcing...

Jethro Storms Dole
February 26 via emergency c-sec
9lb 1oz, 22" long

Jethro was born with a congenital heart defect (CHD) known as Ebstein's Abnormality of the Tricuspid Valve, and Pulmonary Atresia. Ebstein's is a rare defect, only affecting 1 in every 210,000 babies. To make things even more difficult, Jethro was born with a severe form of it.

At this moment, I am writing from his room in the NICU where he was born. We are praying for stability as he is scheduled for surgery in the morning to begin the process of turning his heart into a 2 chamber organ instead of 4 chambered. Tomorrow will be the first of 3 surgeries performed over the next 3 years. It is open heart, so carries a fair amount of risk, but without the surgery, his condition is incompatible with life ~ not something a Mama wants to hear concerning her child.

I have been fairly absent here, and hope to rectify that, but I honestly don't know when I'll be able to.

If you are interested in keeping up with Jethro and what's going on, you can check out our family blog, The Legend of Thousand Hills Farm , or, if you are on Facebook some friends/family have set up a group for him that you can join. It's Jethro Storms Dole.

We appreciate your prayers.

Living Set Apart and Holy

If you follow our family blog, you may have already read this. However, I wanted to post it here as well, because I have some thoughts that I want to share about how this applies to living out our lives as godly wives. This was written by my oldest son, Will, who is 19. After reading it, I asked him if I could share it, and he graciously gave his consent. I hope to post my thoughts on this in the next few days. Here now, is Will's post:

So this is mostly just writing to myself...but honestly most of what I write is. I comprehend and process better if I have to put things into words. So I shall attempt to share the lesson God has been teaching me of late. The subject is holiness.

We shall start with our premise that we, by nature, are sinners condemned to hell. We are condemned to hell because God is holy and perfect and cannot tolerate sin. But because in addition to His holiness and justice, God is also loving and merciful, He offers His son Jesus, as a sacrifice for our sin, and faith in the redeeming work of Christ is the only way to heaven. Once we have by faith accepted that covering for our sin, we are promised a place in heaven. And we are called to be saints...which is where the fun begins...

Like I said, this is something that I have struggled a lot with lately. Mostly because I love my sin. Sin is quite often fun. I mean, some of it isn't, and then there are consequences you have to deal with afterward...but let's be honest, if there wasn't some enjoyable quality to most sin, wouldn't everyone be perfect? And so, I have been trying to walk sideways on the slippery slope of sinning whilst trying to maintain my relationship with Christ. Some people call this walking the fence, but I like the slope analogy better, just because it makes it obvious that it will all lead in one direction. But back to the point. I have really felt God calling me into ministry (not sure what capacity yet, we shall see), and so I've been trying to study more and really grow in Him. And interestingly enough, all at once, He has sent influences from every side, whether it be sermons, to sermons I listen to online, to Bible study, to casual conversations...and it keeps boiling down to one thing. We must live holy, set apart lives for Christ. Which is a hard concept for me, but here's what I've been learning.

As I've been hammered with this subject I have found it interesting the large number of different passages that directly address the issue. Let's go over a few of my favorites...
Ephesians 1:4-"just as He chose us in Him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and without blame before Him in love..." He chose us before the foundation of the world. To be holy. To be without blame. Wow. I don't know about you, but this makes me feel two big things right off the bat-1)How amazing that the God of the universe cares enough about me that before the foundations of our very planet were laid He picked me out to be one of His chosen holy. What an amazing privilege. 2)What a huge responsibility. God went to the trouble of making me, calling me to be like Him, and all I can muster is some half-hearted attempt to be better than the Jones' down the street. How pathetic I am. But despite how much of a loser I am, there is hope. And we will get to that in a bit, but first let's look more into holiness.

Ephesians 4:20-24-"But you have not so learned Christ, if indeed you have heard Him and have been taught by Him, as the truth is in Jesus: that you put off, concerning your former conduct, the old man which grows corrupt according to the deceitful lusts, and be renewed in the spirit of your mind, and that you put on the new man which was created according to God, in true righteousness and holiness." This one is quite interesting to me, because a slight rabbit trail that my brain has been taking with this is the whole idea of "being true to yourself". Everywhere we turn that's what talked about, our entire culture is built upon being yourself and doing what you want. Well I want to propose something here. That the concept of, "being you" is both undesirable and unbiblical. "You" (and me, and anyone walking this earth) are a sinner. Our hearts are corrupt and deceitful (Jeremiah 17:9), beyond repair. We in ourselves, have nothing. There is no good, no commendable qualities to pursue. But there is a second part to that verse in Ephesians, which closely parallels a more familiar Romans passage...

Romans 12:1,2-" I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that you present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable to God, which is your reasonable service. And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God." God doesn't just sit there and tell us how bad we are, but He'll save us anyway. No, he says, yes I saved you from that. I have called you out of the pit and into light-now turn from your wicked ways! Be transformed by the renewing of your mind. This blows my mind, people always talk about how Christianity is a set of rules, just ties you down...it's the exact opposite! Jesus offers ultimate freedom, freedom from ourselves. Freedom from the bondage that is sin.

Romans 6:14-"For sin shall not have dominion over you, for you are not under law but under grace." God pulls us out of sin and allows us to choose life, and choose to follow him. How freeing is that?

My point in all of this is to say that God has called us, as men and women of His, to a higher standard. This isn't just for Pastors, youth leaders, or "spiritual" people. This is everyone who calls themselves a Christian. This world needs change, people. This world needs hope. And that is only going to come through the Gospel, and we will only be effective in spreading that if we are living the life that He has called us to live. Holy. Set apart. Saints of God.

Will Dole copyright 2009

I apologize

I'm sorry that I have not been posting here. I do want to finish Ruth, and there are some other things that I have been pondering. However, we have found out that the baby I am carrying has a serious congenital heart defect, and much of my time has been spent going to Dr. appointments. And most of my blogging time has been spent on our family blog, where I am updating on the baby. If you are interested in keeping up with what is going on with our son's heart, go to The Legend of Thousand Hills Farm .

I do not plan on abandoning this blog! I just don't know how much time I'm going to have to write here. The baby is due in late February, and then we will be spending time in the NICU. Your prayers would be greatly appreciated. For specific prayer requests, you can check out our family blog.

Thank you for your patience!

Holidays

I just added a button on the left from the Old Schoolhouse magazine. They are generously giving away an almost 200 page e-book! It has wonderful ideas for Thanksgiving and Christmas ~ crafts, food, color pages for the children ~ even calender pages for November and December to help you keep the Holiday Chaos under control! :-)

It's a beautiful, full-color e-book. So, download one today and enjoy your holidays!

Ruth Chapter 3

Finally, we are back to Ruth! One of the reasons it has taken me so long to post on Ch. 3, is because I'm not really sure what to say. :-) I find myself reading it, longing for that kind of relationship, but not knowing how to get there.

Ruth trusts the people in her life. On a deeper level, I believe that she trusts God to lead her through the people in her life. When Naomi shares with her the custom of going and laying at a man's (Boaz's) feet, she doesn't argue or question her, she just does it. She trusts her mother-in-law to guide her in doing what is right and appropriate. When Boaz gives her instruction, she doesn't argue or question him either, she just does it. She trusts him to do what is right and good.

The other thing that really struck me in chapter 3, is that although Ruth's actions are bold, she is not. When she goes to the threshing floor, she goes softly, she quietly uncovers his feet and lies down ~ Boaz doesn't even know she's there until the middle of the night. Once he discovers her, he once again commends her character and blesses her.

As a wife, what I take away from chapter 3 is that I need to trust God. My relationship with my Heavenly Father needs to be such that I know Him well enough to know that He is trustworthy. I can trust my Beloved to lead me in paths of righteousness, because I can trust my God to lead me through my Beloved. This is something that I have 'known' for several years, but have had a hard time putting into practice. Over the last couple of years, God has shown me again and again, that even when I can't see it, He is leading through my Beloved. My job is to trust and follow. Not easy for someone as headstrong as I tend to be. But so necessary if I truly want to be a godly woman. I also see that I can do bold things, but they can be accomplished with a meek and gentle spirit. My desire is to behave in such a way that it reflects my Father's character.

Chapter 3 leaves me with the desire to be a godly woman. As my boys grow older and begin to enter the stage of life where they might bring home a young woman who is destined to be their bride, I long to have the kind of relationship that Naomi and Ruth shared. Not to replace or displace her mother, but to add to and bless her with another trusted adviser, to share in common the love of God and which ever son she loves. And that leaves me feeling somewhat adrift. Other than praying for that kind of relationship, I don't know how to achieve it. I don't see that around me. What I see most often is a strained relationship between the mothers of sons and the son's wife. I see young women not willing to listen to the wise counsel of their mother-in-laws, and only willing to listen to and love their own families. And it makes me sad, because I believe that God has so much more for us ~ I believe He shows us what could be in the book of Ruth ~ if we would just embrace His design.

If you have this kind of relationship with a daughter-in-law, would you share with us? Would you share how you have cultivated this love and trust? I am certain that I am not the only one desiring this, and yet at a loss as how to accomplish it when the time comes.